Jane Austen - Sense and Sensibility

 

The plot of Sense and Sensibility is quintessentially Jane Austen. Sisters Elinor and Marianne realise their beaus are fuckboys, are heartbroken, some marital rearrangements ensue, and then everyone gets married. The plot is not the point, of course. The proceedings are only there to as background to the psychological study of Elinor's and Marianne's characters. 

Elinor ("Sense") is the rational one, very cool, level-headed, does not reveal her feelings easily; in short, she is an INTJ or something like that. Marianne ("Sensibility", meaning emotional responsiveness) is the common ENFP type, wears her heart on her sleeve, no filter, etc. In Austen's later Pride and Prejudice, Jane and Elizabeth have almost the same dynamic.

It's interesting to read this book in the 21st century. Austen would say that extreme sensibility is characteristic of our age - just think how publicly we air our emotions on social media. Furthermore, the dominant attitude towards feelings is that you should never, ever bottle them up. Let it all out, regardless of situational appropriateness.

S&S persuades me that more sense would do us well. It's not about repressing emotions - Elinor does not do that - but instead choosing one's words and actions carefully to suit the situation. In the book, both sisters suffer love setbacks. Marianne, predictably, bawls and mopes all the time, but Elinor doesn't say anything, knowing that it would do no one any good for her to be pitied as well. 

The story made me think about a conversation Joel and I had about crying. I never understood the point of not crying; indeed did not think it possible. Joel said that there are situations when giving in to the urge to cry changes the social dynamic for the worse: for example, when you cry hysterically at someone's deathbed, you inadvertently make the situation about you.

I didn't quite get it then, but after reading S&S I think I can see the point. It's worth reflecting on our emotional expressions and thinking about how they affect others.